Thursday, April 23, 2015

A few Kimmy Schmidt quotes


Dang this series had some good writing behind it. I can't recall my favourites so here are a few culled from the internet for posterity:

- Jacqueline: You’ll need to get here by 6:00 every morning to wake Buckley up for school, then get me up at 10:00, but don’t wake me up.

- In order to fix ourselves, we have to start right here. Find that small unbreakable you inside yourself.
- Be you. Be what you want. Then become unbreakable.

- Xanthippe: Kimmy Smith from Middletown, Ohio, I’ve been Googling you.
Kimmy: You have? I didn’t feel it.

- Jacqueline: I look so sad. What filter is this?
Kimmy: None. Hashbrown, no filter.

- Xanthippe: I don’t get you guys. You did all this for Kimmy? She’s the worst.
Lillian: Sure, she’s not perfect. She smiles too much, like a collie. And red hair, brown eyes? Guess God ran out of crayons.
Titus: But he wasn’t out of whatever makes people good.

- Xanthippe: Hey Kimmy. 1996 called. It wants its clothes back.
Kimmy: Hey, Xan. 2090 called. You’re dead, and you wasted your time on Earth.

- Xanthippe: I’ve been watching you, Kimmy.
Kimmy: I know. That’s why I picked my nose earlier… to gross you out. Yeah, BURNT!

- Titus: I envy you. I’ve never been able to meet me.

- Kimmy: I’m so sorry! I was up all night. All my money got stolen, and I haven’t had a clock since my Tamagotchi died.

- Kimmy: Troll the respawn, Jeremy!

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